Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?

Jim, Doug, Jadd and I agreed to a game of golf at Steele Canyon Golf Club. Jim claimed it was at least as hard a course as the legendary Olinda Golf Course (remember the name and tremble in fear) in Melbourne. In case the reader is not a golfer, surmise to say that at the Olinda Golf Course even the mountain goats have a hard time hoofing it over the mountainous terrain. The ninth hole at Olinda is known by the colloquial name of "heart attack hill" a steep road has been built to allow ambulance access; but enough of Olinda: Back to Steele Canyon.

Doug, Linda and Russell enjoy a quick coffee before setting off

The day's golf was touted to be so grueling that we decided we had better have a filling breakfast before starting off, so we found a local diner in Coronado where Russell entertained the waitress and other diners with his "Swedish" accent while we waited for our breakfast to arrive.

Sharing a joke at the diner

Then it was off on the long haul into the mountains that surround San Diego in search of the legendary Steele Canyon.

It's a long, long road. From which there is no return...

Jim, our designated driver (and golf guide) for the day, shows his command of the San Diego freeway system.

Jim: Golf guide extraordinaire

While for most, golfing attire is simply a matter of de rigueur, for others (Doug for example,) it is a constant struggle where fashion clashes with the mandated dress code.

You mean I have to wear a shirt with a collar!?!?

Waiting for us at the first hole was Jadd who had flown in specially for this match. A serious golfer, he was to have his game re-defined by the Aussie-style rough-and-ready rules that were to be played that day.

Jadd had no idea what was in store for him in this extraordinary golf game.

Although still early morning, Doug could see no yard-arm so simply assumed the sun would be over a yard-arm in some time zone somewhere in the world.

Doug oils up his game...

Jim calls for action and Russell calls to "bring it on..." It was time for the game to begin. "Where's this bloody cliff?" says Russell

Game on...

Just then, Jadd cried out: "Snake!" A sidewinder (relative of the hoop snake) was attacking him.

The snake attack.

A fan of The Crocodile Hunter, the fearless Jadd decides to demonstrate his snake handling skills.

This is how The Crocodile Hunter did it...

The snake had a different idea and made several unsuccessful lunges at Jadd's gloved hand.

Jadd, hereafter known as The Snake Hunter shows how it's done.

We decided to rename this course Snake Canyon. After a nerve steadying swig of an ice-cold foaming beer, we continued the game, secure in the knowledge that if we were to run up against another snake, we had The Snake Hunter there with us to take control of the situation.

Jadd and Russell have a side-wager

Meanwhile, Doug waits for The Snake Hunter's all-clear and takes the opportunity to replenish his energy - it was a hot and grueling day after all.

It it safe to get out yet?

The all-clear given, Doug gets onto the fairway and takes an almighty swing at the ball...

Wow! That went so far, I lost sight of the ball...

In anticipation of being allowed to drive in the USA, Russell brushes up on his driving technique in the golf cart.

I can drive a car just like I drive this cart!

After a number of near misses, mostly involving Jadd and Jim, Russell is declared an Unsafe Alien in the USA.

What do you mean collision?! I missed you by this much.

Jim played his usual off-fairway game as a kind of handicap so as not to show up the other golfers in the foursome.

Wow! Did you see that drive?

With all the liquid refreshments, it was comforting to know that the golf cart came equipped with gentleman's bottles.

I can sure use one of these.

The day got longer and, hotter. The game got longer and hotter, The players got to drinking and... well, drinking.

Now, let's see Jim play without these.

As the day wore on, some peculiar local rules were invoked such as confiscation of clubs and ball inspections.

Sorry Goldfinger, it seems this is not your ball.

Late into the afternoon we were pleased to be treated to numerous demonstrations of driving skills (both with the Big Bertha and... the golf cart.)

Jadd close to losing control on the causeway.

It was getting close to the twenty-seventh hole and there was still no clear winner (mostly due to scoring difficulties and an inability to add the scores so late in the afternoon.)

That was such a sweet putt.

We decide to replay the twenty-seventh indefinitely until there was a clear winner. So back we trekked to the tee.

"Did you see that?.." "Sorry, I was taking a picture."

We replayed that hole so often, it was beginning to feel like my garden at home. Many more times and i would have got out the mower.

I can even win this one-handed!

Jim decided to demonstrate some fancy golf shots. Unfortunately they didn't all go as planned.

Ok, so one-handed wasn't such a good idea.

At the end of the day, the match was canceled due to lack of daylight. After many recounts, through the fog of beer, it is still unclear to this day either who actually won or... just how many holes we played.

An Hour of Shower...

Barbra invited Lidy and Russell to her Bikram Yoga class at Bikram's Yoga College of India in San Diego.

We had heard a little about Bikram Yoga: It's HOT, the room temperature is maintained at around 100 degrees F (38 degrees Celsius); The yoga positions are gruelling and; the sessions are long.

We should have been warned when Barbra started to force feed us water, juice and energy drinks to the point where we were spending more time in the bathroom (toilet) than in the lounge room.

We eventually arrived at Bikram's Yoga College of India and were introduced by Barbra to a bunch of near naked women as: "these are my Aussie cousins..." Things were looking up.

The time came to enter the exercise room, and we were welcomed by the Bikram Instructor with: "Welcome to the torture chamber..." We were worried.

With two mats on the floor and drink bottles at our side we attempted to keep up. At the start, it seemed simple enough.

Simple enough.

As the class got into the more extreme parts of the session, we had no hope of maintaining the poses, and even less of maintaining our balance. The heat in the room created a constant river of sweat to drip from our bodies, almost as if we were standing in a very hot shower.

Getting harder

After an hour of "torture," (and to our relief), the Bikram Yoga finished and we could at last emerge into the balmy 73 degrees Farenheit that was San Diego.

Lidy, Russell and Barbra - We SURVIVED Bikram Yoga

Sleepless in San Diego

And on the second day:....

We decided to go for a short stroll to stretch our legs. We headed for an old friend, the Hotel Del Coronado or, as the locals call it, "The Del"

Built in 1888, this beautiful, Victorian seaside hotel has a storied and romantic history. Guests have included Presidents, movie stars and even Edward, the Prince of Wales (who may have met his legendary love, Wallis Simpson, there).

The Del

The hotel is believed to be haunted by the ghost of Kate Morgan. In 1892, the young woman checked into the Hotel Del Coronado to meet her estranged husband for Thanksgiving. He never arrived to meet her, and a few days later, she was found dead on the hotel steps near the ocean. Since then, guests and staff of the Hotel Del Coronado have noticed strange breezes, ghostly noises and the pale figure of a young lady walking in a black lace dress.

We walked through the Del and down Orange Avenue, the main street. By now, it was lunch time (or was that breakfast Australian time?)

Lidy and her hamburger.

We stopped at a sidewalk restaurant and Russell had a great meal of salmon and salad. Lidy had an open hamburger. Yummm.

The loooonnnnnngggggg wait for the bus...

Lunch eaten, it was time to catch the bus into San Diego and some serious shopping...

The bus - at the pointy end

The bus operator and Russell had a long conversation comparing the entitlements of bus operators in Australia to those in San Diego. Interestingly, the ticketing system used in San Diego is the same system used in Brisbane and is just as (un)reliable!!!! The tall console to the right of the driver accepts coins and notes and issues change so that the operator never needs to handle money.

Jimmy Love's "Jazz" Restaurant

In San Diego, we visited Jimmy Love's for dinner. this is a Jazz restaurant with live bands. We thought we might have a chance of a dance or two after dinner.

Great meal at an even greater table.

The meal was great, and the atmosphere delightful but, when I asked the band to play "Minnie the Moocher", they sent back a note to say they didn't know it!!!!

The three piece "Jazz" band

We left and went instead to an old favourite, The Hard Rock Cafe where we had a couple of decadent sundaes...

Lidy has another mouthful.

Russell looks worried he may not get it all in his gob!

San Diego Dreaming: The 13th at last!

San Diego MORNING:

We're staying on Coronado Island with Jim & Linda, Russell's cousins.

Linda has a thing for carrots. She welcomed us on our first morning with a huge pitcher of blended carrot juice.

Cheers!

After breakfast, the first stop for Lidy & Russell was the bank. Easy as. But we can only get it to issue $US700.00 at a time, and then only in $US20.00 notes.


Wallet and purse bulging with green stuff, Lidy decided she needed to suss out the shopping venues. I had always thought Lidy was the master shopper of the family; that is until Barbra took us in tow. She is like an encyclopedia of shopping and knows where to get things at the best prices.


For luncheon, Jim & Linda surprised us with a Thai treat. The Thai House restaurant in San Diego. Mmmmmmmm. Delicious.


If there is one way to beat jetlag, its to party your way through the jetlag barrier. That's exactly what we did. Jim organised a barbecue and pretty soon we had a house full of family and friends, rocking on into the wee hours.


It was a big night and for some, it was an even bigger night. Dave crashed early, but recovered well later.

Wot! Still the 12th??!!... Four hours in LA and the world's your oyster; The bars are temples but the pearls ain't free...

We were met at LAX by Doug (What do you call a man holding a shovel?) in his massive Ford ute (he calls it a truck, and to be truthful, that's probably a more realistic description.) Here we said goodbye to James who is going to solo it up to San Francisco for a week of partying before heading East for Kentucky. Lidy and Russell said their goodbye's and set off with Doug to the nearby parking station.

Doug was going to deliver us to LA's Union Station so we could catch the train to San Diego. We threw our bags into the back of his truck and jumped in.

We travelled the huge freeways toward LA proper and tried to catch a glimpse of the city through the ever-present smog.


Doug made a point of showing us the towering city detention centre and two city gaols (or jails) that stand proudly in the centre of LA.

Just over the road from the detention centre is a city landmark: Phillipe The Original French Dipped Sandwiches:

Here is where the movie makers of LA luncheon. Doug works as a movie producer and this is his favourite restaurant. We parked the truck and went inside.

The interior is decked out just like a 1930's diner, complete with a set of old-style phone booths - with working phones!


Russell ordered the double-triple turkey sandwich - double dipped with sides of coleslaw, potatoe salad and a beer.

YUMMMMMMM! Of course, those of you who have been to America and those of you who live in America will know that in this country the word "sandwich" is actually used to describe what everyone else in the world knows is a bread roll.

Meanwhile, Lidy thought she had ordered a beef sandwich double dipped. When the order was delivered it turned out to be: 1) a beef sandwich with double beef, double dipped; 2) a bowl of stew; 3) a plate of coleslaw; 4) a plate of potatoe salad and; 5) a pickled egg...??? What tha...

"Gee" said the waitress, "You people sure talk funny."

Something was lost in the translation.

We left the fabulous Phillipe and got back into the truck. It was time to make our connection with the San Diego train. Russell went over to the truck and climbed in...

Whoops... Wrong door. Make a note to self: The Yanks drive on the wrong side of the road!

Then off we drove to Union Station.

Where we had to buy our tickets to San Diego from a vending machine. Initially, Russell had some small problem with the machine.

but that was quickly sorted out with a few "technical taps" and the ticket was issued.

Tickets in hand, we walked toward the platform.

Suddenly, Doug shot off to the side. He had found a buddy of his who also works in Hollywood. "Hey buddy, what are you doing here?" "We're shooting some scenes up near the platforms." Doug turned to Lidy and Russell: "Do you want to be in the movies?" "Yes!!!! Pleeeeease!!!" they answered.

After saying goodbye to Doug's buddy, we followed Doug along the walkway toward the platforms. Sure enough, there were literally hundreds of movie people milling around some actors with lights, cameras, sound equipment and miles of cable twisting all over the ground. We passed a "Release" sign and entered into the reality that was Hollywood.

Just then, the Director yelled: "ACTION!" We were on the set as accidental extras!!! Yahoo!!!!

All too soon, our wonderful, modern, AmTrak train arrived and it was time to say a heartfelt "Cheerio..." to Doug and LA, at least for now.


Watch out San Diego: We may be jet-lagged, but we're prepared to party with the best you've got!!! BRING IT ON...